Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Oops.

Speaking of unmentionables, I have some tips for the mother of all unmentionables in the cleaning business: Breakage.

A person who cleans for a living touches or cleans around hundreds of fragile items each week.

Until recently, I personally went into the job with the attitude that probability dictates that things will get broken. You clean a hundred houses, you're going to lose at least one knickknack.

That's a reasonable attitude, but if that one knickknack happens to be an irreplaceable personal heirloom, telling the client that it was inevitable and buying something that looks like it is cold comfort.

In my time working for myself and other people, I have seen two approaches to avoiding breakage. The main one is to never touch anything fragile. That means letting dust collect around that giant antique vase on the floor and watching cobwebs form around the fine China dishes displayed on top of the cabinet. Many clients prefer that, and will point out items they don't want to be touched upfront. I have one client I do careful allergy-type dusting for who can't clean much herself, but she has a sentimental figurine shelf that she takes care of herself for that reason.

A second approach is to clean everything and pray a lot. That was always my approach. If you don't tell me not to clean it, I'll at least wave a duster at it every time. That works great most of the time. But every so often, there will be items that my gut tells me to give a wide berth. Nearly every time I don't, I find myself apologizing profusely and scrambling to make good. (And by every time, I mean I can count the casualties from five years of cleaning houses off and on on one hand.)

If you're a cleaner, or you are thinking about employing one, here are some general rules for spotting hazards. Avoiding putting your stuff in those situations can go along way to ensuring it makes it through cleaning day intact.

Location, location, location


There is a physical "danger zone" below knee-level and above eye-level. Anytime you have to reach to pick up or dust over an object, you risk knocking it over. Items displayed on the floor or on low surfaces where they are likely to be set on the floor when you are cleaning can get stepped on, knocked over or risk chips and breaks from being put down too fast on a hard floor. Even under the bed is a danger zone, as few cleaners want to be caught not cleaning under the bed, but it is not unheard of for them to poke a sweeper or broom under there without looking first (ahem).  Items that have to be awkwardly reached behind or between things are also in a danger zone. As are ones that you can't see the bottom of because they are above tippy-toes eye level.  Any flat surface that cannot be seen while standing on the floor is one that should not be touched without a step ladder. You can't know the shelf or ledge is empty until you physically look at it.

Balancing act


Precariously balanced things are another big minefield. My big example is a heavy flower pot or vase on a little wood or wire stand on the floor. Anytime the load is heavier than whatever it's sitting on, you have an unstable situation that can lead to a broken pot or broken stand. Even on a stable surface like a counter, a light dish holding heavy decorative stones or a potted plant won't withstand being picked up or scooted with the load on it.  Wall and stand displays for fragile things like dishes and sculptures are easy to accidentally knock down to begin with, so if they are not anchored and barely standing or hanging in place, they are likely to get knocked down, or even fall on their own when something nearby is moved.

 Traffic hazard


Delicate things in high-traffic and high-cleaning activity areas are another one. The bathroom is a big one. People can't help but decorate the sides of those big "garden" type bathtubs, for example. I have seen glass vases, seashells and candlesticks sitting on the edges of tubs that only the most standoffish cleaners wouldn't want to clear and wipe. The back of the toilet and the top of the medicine cabinet are two other places people like to decorate. Toilet tank lids are usually slightly rounded, and medicine cabinet tops are always well above eye level, so both need to be approached with extreme caution. Kitchens, window sills and entryways are other high-traffic, high cleaning action areas that are dangerous for fragile items.

Simply put, it is a housecleaner's job to handle all those situations. No house on Earth has all its fragile items in a locked China cabinet or on a chest-level whatnot shelf.  Odds are good that a commercial "quick clean" service will automatically bypass such situations unless the cleaners are expressly told that the areas need to be cleaned.  Even when a cleaner zips in and out with no intention of meticulously cleaning everything, your stuff is still subject to people bumping around and waving dusters and rags in the vicinity.

The best thing to do is be mindful, and keep valuables out of risky situations. For the cleaner's part, she or he has to be aware of all breakage hazards and ask for permission and use care when cleaning around precariously situated delicate things. Trust me, any client would prefer a spot of dust to a shattered family heirloom. If an item is that important and that fragile, the easiest route would be to ignore it and let the client keep it clean and move it around once in a while so you can dust. It's helpful for a client to note what's particularly valuable in his or her home, but a cleaner really must approach everything as though it cannot be replaced.

Here is a picture of what NOT to do: Never stick a duster, mop or vacuum hose somewhere you can't see. Every flat surface in a house can be home to breakable decorations and accessories. If you are going to wipe above eye level, you need to at least get up on a step ladder and survey the tops of everything before running a duster across them. Working in a jacket, or even a loose smock or apron is a bad idea also. As in a factory, loose clothing, jewelry and hair risk getting getting hung up on things, only in a home it's your valuables, not the worker's limbs, that are in danger.


Friday, December 6, 2013

Mention Your Unmentionables

Free delivery service for basic household products!

This is a new service I started providing for clients who have a tough time getting to the store, but I am offering it to anyone, whether you're disabled, too busy or just lazy.

The prices are my retail cost per unit, rounded up a few pennies to a couple dollars for easy numbers and to defray the cost of gas and sales tax.

I'm not selling sundries, I am bringing them to you as a part of my cleaning service. The in-stock supply costs are retail warehouse club prices, which are generally a little to a lot better than grocery store ones, especially for single units and small packages. The cost of the items I can order is the straight-up retail price I pay to get them from the manufacturer or supply house.

Here's the list. Please mention what you need when you make your appointment. In-stock items can be requested by phone anytime before your scheduled day.


JustClean

HOUSEKEEPING BY KAREN

Tuscaloosa, AL, 205-331-0422
www.JustCleanTuscaloosa.com

Household Supply Delivery

Basic paper and cleaning supplies delivered free during scheduled appointments. Cost will be added to your bill.

In stock now:

Bathroom tissue........................... 50¢/roll, $3.50 pack of 9
Paper towels................................................ 1.50/roll
Unscented laundry pods ................................... 25¢ each
13-gallon trash bags ......................................... 15¢ each
XL disposable underwear................ 50¢ each, $15 pack of 32
Unscented or lemongrass glycerin logo soaps............ 25¢ each

Available on request:

PURE unscented disinfectant........................... $15/ 32-*oz
Seventh Generation thymol disinfectant ................  $4/32 oz
Seventh Generation unscented dish soap............. $3.50/25 oz
Procyon unscented degreaser concentrate............. $15/32 oz
Just G all purpose cleaner concentrate ................. $25/32 oz
Dr. Bronner’s unscented Castile soap ...... $12/16 oz, $18/32 oz

Suggested items (specific brands as available)

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Sunday, December 1, 2013

Barkeeper's Friend


 

What you get


Well, it depends on what you need.

But my gameplan is to detail-dust the corners and common areas of the bar, including knickknacks, fixtures, under the bar and stools and anywhere else cobwebs, dust and debris may congregate.

I'll also do the backbar, the one place in a bar that gets cleaned daily, if it needs it.

And give a good scrubbing to the restrooms, and sweep and mop all the floors. 

And I will do it all on the day early-morning bars are closed the longest, in the wee hours of Sunday morning between Saturday night closing time and opening the next afternoon.

Dusting is not a fast job, especially when it involves poles and ladders and wiping layers of sediment off by hand. Saturday after close should be plenty of time to get everything cleaned up and take care of any special requests or conditions. 

 

Why?


"Wait a minute. What does a methodical, allergy free cleaner want with a smoke-encrusted bar?"

Good question.

I have never cleaned a bar, and I don't know of any professional service that has. As I understand it, most small bar owners make their poor bartenders do it.

But I came up with the idea simply because allergy-type cleaning has me dusting like a maniac all the time.

Is there any place more in need of maniacal dusting than a bar? I haven't been inside one in years, but, if I remember right, the best bars are full of memorabilia and signs that are coated with dust and cobwebs.

In my opinion, there is a fine line between cozy and scary.

The $200 overnight deal is a one-time thing that a bar might want to do every few years or so. No drinking establishment wants to be too bright and spotless. But a good whack at the dust and cobwebs once in a while will help everyone breathe easier and keep the place from becoming too dirty to clean without making a major (and much more expensive) ordeal out of it.

Am I going to end up destroying the character of beloved dive bars in town? Will some places fall apart if the dust holding everything together is removed?

I hope not. We shall see!

Friday, November 29, 2013

Yes, this blog is still alive.

Would you look at that. No posts in three months.

I am one of those lazy idiots driving customers to Facebook instead of my own Web properties.

Monday, August 5, 2013

If You Would Clean Wood

I mentioned my longtime aversion to aerosol furniture polish in my previous post.

Spray polish is stinky and environmentally incorrect, but it is also the wrong cleaner for just about all surfaces (If there is a suitable application for Pledge, I am not aware of it.)  If you have ever melted or discolored the finish on a piece of furniture while trying to clean it, you know what I am talking about.

The only thing wood and wood-like surfaces need most of the time is dusting. And if you can't stand kicking up dust, a microfiber cloth or a rag dampened with plain water or a little mild soap water will do the trick.

But if your furniture is dirty, or if you can't stand the thought of cleaning without leaving some sort of "product" residue and smell behind, you need to know what kind of finish your furniture has before proceeding.

There are three main types of clear wood finishes: Hard varnish-type coatings, oil and wax. Furniture may also be painted or not finished at all.

Here is a handy FAQ sheet from a wood finishing site that includes a good explanation of how to tell what kind of finish you're dealing with.

"How can we tell if the wood has been waxed, oiled or varnished?
If a wooden surface looks like it already has been finished with a product it is always a good idea to find out what that finish is as it may affect which product you should apply to the wood. For example, you could not really apply an oil over a varnished floor, but an existing floor that has been oiled can be re-coated with an oil (once it has been cleaned of course!). Here's a few pointers to find out what your wood has been finished with:
  • Waxed surfaces If it has wax on it you can scrape it lightly with your finger nail (once it has been cleaned). You may get a little wax under your nail. Also you can try buffing it with a cloth. Most surfaces will become shinier once buffed, but a waxed surface will substantially increase in shine.
  • Oiled surfaces Generally speaking oiled surfaces are not that glossy. If you stand something on the surface of an oiled surface it will not have much of a reflection. Instead you are likely to see a fuzzy image reflected. You can also try putting a little white spirit on a small unnoticeable area and if it dissolves the surface coating then it is likely to be an oil, please note however that this may leave a white spot. White spirit will also dissolve most wax polishes so check the above advice (waxed surfaces) before trying this.
  • Varnished Surfaces A varnished surface will be hard to the touch (it will make a clicking sound when you knock your nails on it) and will have a reflective surface. Even a matt varnish will reflect the light more than an oiled surface. If something is stood on the surface (with a window in view behind it) then the reflection is clearly visible. A satin or gloss varnish will have a very clear reflection of anything that is held up to the surface."
These yard sale items look like oiled, unfinished and painted wood. Of course there is no way to know for sure without seeing them in person. Except for the painted piece. Wood and wood finishes do not generally come in blue.

Cleaning


Ol' Doc Bronner's granddaughter put up this good explanation on her blog last spring, and it includes tips for identifying the type of finish you have and advice for how to clean each kind.

The short version is, mild soapy water is a good all-purpose go-to. She recommends two of her family company's soaps, though I have found that a little bit of any oil soap in water always does a good job. Especially since there is so much fake and painted wood out there.

One caveat, though. Furniture and flooring industry types say NEVER use oil soap (Like Dr. Bronner's and Murphy's) on polyurethane-coated wood.  Here is an open letter by a flooring company president that explains why.

Polyurethane is plastic, so you're cleaning plastic-coated wood. That means plain water, vinegar water or other window-type cleaners are going to be your best bet. Oily and soapy cleaners will leave a film just like they would if you tried to clean a mirror with them.

I believe polyurethane is even replacing real varnish on furniture these days, so it's probably a good idea to forego oil soap on all hard-finished wood. And this advice goes for Formica and other synthetic surfaces colored to look like wood. If it's plastic, oil's not good for it.

Oh, and if you're lucky enough to encounter particle board coated with wood-grain adhesive paper (very commonly used for cheap flat-pack furniture and inside even decent kitchen cabinets), be gentle and don't get it wet. That "finish" is nothing but a big sticker, and it scratches, bubbles and loses its design very easily. Use a similar approach to painted furniture, which can also be marred by too vigorous cleaning.

Polishing

I am personally not a fan of the big shiny-shiny. If I am coming to clean, I want to get the dirt up and be on my way. Polishing and shining is always a second step that has to be done after a surface is cleaned. Trying to polish dirty furniture invites streaks and scratches, even when you're using those all-in-one sprays that mix oil and solvents on the premise that you can somehow magically pick up dirt and put down polish at the same time. Polishing is not everyday cleaning, no matter what the chemical company marketers say.

Cleaning is a regular thing that can be done with a dry or damp cloth every week or so. Polishing is a separate, special thing that you want to do a few times a year at most to protect your furniture and keep it looking pretty. And, actually, when I say "polishing," what I really mean is "refinishing." You don't need to strip the old finish and start from scratch generally, but you are putting a new finish on your piece when you apply oil or wax. And if you're keeping it clean and doing that sparingly, you won't have to do that very often, and you're not going to find yourself fighting gooey product buildup.
 
Hard varnishes and lacquers: See previous. You don't polish hard-sealed furniture, you shine it.

Oils: If your furniture has a porous, lustrous sheen, it has an oil-based finish that can be renewed periodically. Natural-health types, including green cleaning bible writer Karen Logan say they use olive oil and make a cleaner-polish with vinegar and olive oil. I do not recommend that for two reasons: For one, olive oil is an expensive, nutritious food item that I refuse to demote to a cleaning supply. It also stays wet, and it can go rancid. I can't imagine what serious cleaners were thinking when they decided using olive oil as a polish was a good idea.  You want to polish with oil, try hard-drying ones like walnut, linseed and tung.

Waxes: A somewhat softer and shiny surface that, unlike varnishes, can be scratched with a dull instrument like a fingernail and noticeably wears away with time.. Just as you polish oil-finished furniture with oil, you polish wax-finished furniture with wax. And doing both right involves applying the oil or wax, letting it dry if applicable, and buffing it off to leave a nice hard shine. I have seen some DIY natural wax recipes, but there are lots of natural beeswax-based furniture pastes out there. Given the amount of kooky homemade cleaner advice out there, I am entirely comfortable with deferring to the pros on this one. Here is a wonderful info page written by a professional furniture restorer who has seen all the damage wrought by modern cleaning and "polishing" chemicals. He is pretty firm that waxing every few years is the only thing you need to do besides dusting when it comes to natural-finished wood. And, being as he and the guys in his field keep furniture looking good for decades, I am confident his advice is the best you're going to find. So much so, that I am going to dial way back on the furniture-washing and stick to dry and water-damp dusting unless you make a special appointment to have your stuff polished. And if you want it polished every week, you need to find yourself a Pledge-sprayer. I am not the lady for that job.